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Talk Wrestling Online Community Newsletter #232 - 28/02/10 - One year on...
____________________________________ Talk Wrestling Online Community Newsletter Issue #232 – February 28th 2010 ____________________________________  The Editorial Welcome, one and all, to the latest edition of the Talk Wrestling Online Community Newsletter. As the title suggests, it's been one year since I took over the editorial reigns of this fine publication and, in that time, we've had a lot of ups, a fair few downs and some situations that, when looked back upon, make me smile. But nostalgia, as nice as it can be, is about looking back and if you're looking back, you can't go forward, so with that in mind, here's to the next twelve months of providing entertaining and informative articles for your reading pleasure. In this edition, Inno discusses why he feels like he's seen this before in Live Wire, Fiona has a look at the forum reaction to Vince's latest PPV naming debacle in Quote/Unquote, Laffy divulges her views on the fortnight's sporting action in Field of Play, Darkstar interrogates another willing victim in Room101, Alan Smithee returns with his comments on the current TNA scene with The Impact Zone, TPIB runs down the results in his WWE in Review column, I profile another female director in Movie Mayhem and, last, but not least, Kam stats us good and proper with the numbers that matter. Without any further delay, let's get cracking, DC --------------------------------------------------------------- Meet The Team ---------------------------------------------------------------  1) With regards to the ongoing "saga", does Wayne Bridge have any right to be upset over Vanessa Perroncel sleeping with John Terry seeing as how they had split up well before the actual affair took place? Does that fact, in effect, mean who she sleeps with has nothing to do with him? DC: I can understand him being upset that they got together at least once while his son was in the same building, but that's it. Vanessa and Wayne's relationship was over before the affair with Terry started, so he can't claim to have been done over by anyone in that regard. Kam: I've tried to ignore everything about this story so don't know what's the truth...I don't really care. Laffy: Personally I think you should never sleep with your best mate, or even mate's bird, in case of hurting the other person involved. They had broken up, but it's really tacky the way he did it. Inno: I'll wait and see what Max Clifford tells me to think. Fiona: As I don't know who any of these people are, then, quite frankly, I don't care. People's personal lives are their own and should stay that way. Darkstar: They split up. As far as I can see, that means it's nothing to do with him anymore, unless he wants her back, in which case he has every right to be pissed at his 'mate'. But I dont think that's the case. 2) Sticking with Wayne Bridge; according to press reports, he's "livid at having to give up his England career over Terry’s affair." Do you feel he's been forced to quit, or is it just a case of him cutting off his nose to spite his face? DC: The guy has basically sabotaged his own international career when he didn't have to. Choosing to say no to his country and then blaming Terry for it is stupid. The longer this is going on, the worse Bridge is coming across. Kam: I'm sorry...but again, I don't care. Laffy: Reading the articles today about his supposed reasons and the hatred he has toward Terry, I really don't think the two would be able to co-exist together. Bridge is doing the right thing, even though it's hurting him to reject his country. Inno: I think he's done the honourable thing. If he'd gone, and played badly, or Terry had played badly, all he would have heard would have been "Well, that's because of their personal issues". I think the guy's been put into a position where he has done NOTHING WRONG and yet he's suffering for the actions of others. Fiona: Again, this is a case of don't care much. Darkstar: He didnt have to quit, he chose to, big difference. He can stop playing for sympathy. 3) Every election, voter apathy is a big talking point, but sometimes, it's down to none of the candidates being worth voting for. With the General Election expected this year, do you think that, on the voting slip, there should be an option for "NONE OF THE ABOVE"? Would this show the politicians exactly how the British public feel? If the option was there, would it encourage you to use your vote because it allows your opinion to be heard? DC: I honestly believe that if there was a "NONE OF THE ABOVE" option on the voting slip, more people would turn out on polling day. Think about it; at the moment, voter apathy is at an all time high, with the politicians thinking that the majority are just too lazy to go to the polling stations rather than realising a lot of us simply don't want to vote for someone we don't want, so elect not to go. If this option was available, then the British Public[tm] could all voice their opinion, letting the politicians know that we have no faith in any of them. Kam: The problem with this is that most politicians are screwed either way. No matter what decisions they decide to make they will inevitably upset certain groups pretty much most of the time. I would expect a lot of people to select that option for that very reason hence why I don't think it ever should be an option. Laffy: Personally, I only vote for one party, as there is no way I would ever vote Tory, even if you paid me loads of money. I think it's a good message to send saying "None of the Above", but I feel it's also wasting my vote. I believe in the party I support, so will continue to vote, even if they have let me down recently. Inno: Meh, I don't vote anyway. All politicians are lying f**kers, what does it matter who is doing the lying? Fiona: If you wanted to vote "None of the Above", then just don't vote. Maybe a decrease in the voting public would show the same thing. I would never use it as an election is the only place to have your opinion heard. Darkstar: I vote anyway, but I'd appreciate a NOTA section. -------------------------------------------------------------- Talk Wrestling Online Subscribers -------------------------------------------------------------- Thanks to all the Talk Wrestling Online Subscribers: Anime_Otaku + + briggsy + BRM + Cathal + Chris2K + Darkstar + Dr. Zero + Drake + dsrchris + Fiona + G2G + Gempire + Inno + Jayfunk + Jimmy Redman + JobberJoe + John Hancock + Laffy + Maxximus + Nemesis Enforcer + Omega + Reno + Saz + Shane O Mac + Tommate2k9 + TPIB  Total Subscribers: 26 To find out how you can help support Talk Wrestling Online and become a subscriber see: * Talk Wrestling Online Subscriber Scheme * --------------------------------------------------------------- Talk Wrestling Online Stats ---------------------------------------------------------------  MOST ACTIVE THREADS IN THE LAST 14 DAYS: 1. Tournament to crown the best Tag Team/Stable [US Scene Forum] 2. XTV5:44 BOOKING THREAAAAD [TWO Stars > Booking and Creative Forum] 3. How Are You Today? [General Chat] 4. The last film you watched? [Entertainment Forum] 5. Comments That Don't Require Their Own Thread [US Scene Forum] 6. WWE Changes More PPVs [US Scene Forum] 7. Football News 2009/10 [Other Sports Forum] 8. WWE Elimination Chamber Discussion 2010 [US Scene Forum] 9. Shane Helms, Burchil and Maria Future Endeavor'd [US Scene Forum] 10. WWE NXT Discussion Thread - February 23, 2010 [US Scene Forum] MOST ACTIVE MEMBERS IN THE LAST 7 DAYS: 1. Darkstar 2. DC 3. Inno 4. Dante Spears 5. Jung 6. The Beltster 7. GoldStandard 8. JC 9. Jayfunk 10. Mitchell ---------------------------------------------------------------  Change is inevitable. Change is constant. Benjamin Disraeli (1804-1881) British politician and author --------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------- Forum Member's Picks of the Fortnight (Joey Asbo) --------------------------------------------------------------- ~Website~ The website I've been on the most (TWO aside of course  ) would have to be UFC.com. I think it's a great website, especially around the time of PPVs, with videos of the weigh-ins, Q&As before the events and post fight press confrences. All stuff which really enhances the anticipation of a PPV.~Movie~ I rediscovered my love of Taken this week after there was a discussion about it in the movies thread. A great action film one, that I genuinly think stands up against any Bond film. ~Album~ Well, I've just got my ticket for T in the Park, so i've been listening to a lot of bands who will be playing there, with a big shout to a fairly unknown band called Two Door Cinema Club. But if i had to pick one album, it would be be Ignore the Ignorant by The Cribs. If anyone has read my posts in the "What are you listening to" thread, they might have picked up that I'm a MASSIVE Cribs fan! ~Book~ I've been reading Lord of the Flies by William Golding. I last read the book when studying it for my GCSE's many years ago and always said I'd love to come back to it without the pressure of studying. For those who've not heard of Lord of the Flies, it's a story about a group of boys whose plane crashes on a deserted island. The resultant lack of adults, social structure and rules has a huge impact on the mentalilty of the boys. It's a classic. ~TV Show~ Archer If anyone hasn't seen this, it's a quirky adult cartoon, that has just started airing on FIVER, about a spy called Sterling Archer, whose boss is also his mother. Genuinely funny show, would highly recommend it to anyone who likes Family Guy, American Dad, Dilbert, etc. ~Videogame~ I'm still playing UFC 2009 Undisptued on XBOX, doing the career mode. Having completed a career with little sucess as a lightweight muay thai fighter, I've started again as a heavyweight kickboxer and just won the heavyweight title from Lesnar. ~Sporting Moment~ With an honourable mention to the Rugby League World Club Challenge, there could only be one moment for me and that was the infamous "Soccer AM hankshake" moment between Wayne Bridge and John Terry. I felt incredibly uncomfortable and tense waiting for the moment where they would come face to face. To cap that off, Chelsea got beat and it was an entertaining second half of the game! ~Celebrity Moment~ This is a difficult one for me, because I'm not really one for all the celebrity gossip sort of stuff. I'm going to say the Ashley/Cheryl Cole situation, just because that's the only thing I can remotely have an opinion on. Always thought Ashley seems a massive tw*t, didn't know what she saw in him. Now she probably wishes she didn't have "Mrs Cole" tattooed on her neck. Only one thing can make the whole celebrity love/affair scandals come full circle and right all the wrongs.. Brendan "Dances With Wives" Cole. --------------------------------------------------------------- Movie Mayhem (DC) ---------------------------------------------------------------  Quote:
Ladies and gentlemen, I give to you, the incomparable Kathryn Bigelow.  Born an only child in 1951 in San Carlos, California, Kathryn Bigelow started on her road to Hollywood by taking up a painting position in New York's Whitney Museum. From there, she studied film, earning a Masters, at Columbia University before moving on to teaching at the California Institute of the Arts. All of this was just a prelude to what would become her defining career, that of a feature film director. This career got off to a low-key start with the release of The Loveless in 1982, a forgettable biker movie she co-directed with Monty Montgomery that's only really notable for being the acting debut of Willem Dafoe (in a credited role). Whether it was due to the lacklustre response to her debut, or some other factor, Bigelow wouldn't get behind the lens for another five years... but, boy, was it worth the wait. In 1987, two major vampire movies were released, The Lost Boys and Near Dark, but only one of them was really designed for the mainstream audiences of the time, so only one of them stormed the box-office. Bigelow's masterpiece didn't even break even as the Kiefer Sutherland-led band of MTV vampires ran away with all the glory. Now, don't get me wrong, I love The Lost Boys, but Near Dark deserved so much better. Starring Lance Henriksen, Bill Paxton and Jenette Goldstein, all three of whom being staples of James Cameron's films, while also giving Adrian Pasdar (Nathan from Heroes) his first high-profile leading role, Near Dark tells the tale of a nomadic family of vampires (who are never referred to as such, with the actual term "vampire" never even being mentioned by anyone), who encounter Caleb (Pasdar) and end up taking him in after he is bitten by Mae, a young female member of the group. Playing like a western, the film is brutal and raw, with Bill Paxton's turn as Severen being the stand out role and, for me, the best thing he's done in a career filled with great roles. Lance Henriksen is, as usual, spellbindingly charismatic and the no-frills methods the "vampires" employ make this a treat to watch. If you haven't seen it, please do so as soon as you can. With Near Dark beign critically acclaimed, but savaged commercially, Bigelow, in a pattern that would become her norm, took another break, this time of three years, during which time she married Terminator direrctor James Cameron, before returning with the police thriller Blue Steel. Sterling performances from both Jamie Lee Curtis and Ron Silver (heroine and villain respectively) and tight direction from the lady herself lift this above the standard thriller fare of the era. Curtis is a rookie cop who, in the process of attending a hold up, shoots and kills the robber. Eugene Hunt (Silver), who was in the area at the time, swipes the gun as it falls to the ground and goes on to kill random women with it, while, since the weapon wasn't found, Megan Turner (Curtis) faces charges of gunning down an unarmed man. Can she find Hunt before he kills again and prove she's innocent? Well, you know the answer to that before you even press play, but it's the journey to that conclusion which makes this a joy to watch and really show a woman comfortable with the director tag. With her latest film doing well at the box-office and taking plaudits left and right, there was no break between Blue Steel and her next (and possibly most famous) film, Point Break. There's virtually no-one on the planet who dislikes Point Break and it's easy to see why. Two charismatic (in their own way) leads, a killer premise and fantastic action all add up to one amazing experience... plus we also get Gary Busey in a supporting role and, as everyone knows, Gary Busey in your movie makes it watchable regardless of anything else. For those who haven't seen it, Point Break is about the FBI's investigation into the "Ex-Presidents", a group of bank robbing surfers who wear masks of former United States Presidents (hence the name) to hide their identities as they rob banks across the US. Their M.O. is simple, in and out in two minutes, take only the money from the cashiers and never go for the vault. Since no-one has ever gotten close to them, it's decided that FBI agent Johnny Utah (Reeves) must go undercover and infiltrate the ranks by befriending their suspected leader, Bodhi (Swayze). What follows is an adrenaline rush of a motion picture, with great action scenes, high suspense, stunning surfing montages and truly touching moments between various characters. You genuinely get a feel for every main character in the film and get emotionally involved in their fates. This is the film that made the world stand up and notice Kathryn Bigelow in Hollywood. Unfortunately for Bigelow, her marriage ended during this time and she took another hiatus before returning with Strange Days, my favourite film of those directed by her. Surprisingly, for Hollywood anyway, the marriage break-up wasn't a bitter affair, with Cameron writing and producing this movie for his ex-wife. In fact, this was the last time he wrote a script he wouldn't then go on to direct.  Set in a then-future 1999 Los Angeles, with the new millenium fast approaching, the film stars Ralph Fiennes as Lenny Nero, a disgraced ex-cop who now deals in SQUID recordings, images captured directly from a person's cerebral cortex, allowing them to be replayed into someone else, with that person experiencing every sensation the original "donor" did at the time. Lenny only deals in erotic images, but some people like to deal in snuff memories, known in the movie as black jacks. Lenny receives a memory from an unknown source and plays it to himself, only to recoil in horror as he sees a beautiful woman he met earlier today being raped and murdered. The event is even more horrific because the person commiting the crimes has found a way to hardwire the technology so that two people can feel the other's sensations as they happen. In this case, the woman being raped is forced to experience what it feels like to be the guy raping her, a horrible thought that terrifies Nero. Alongside his good friend Max (played by Bigelow regular Tom Sizemore), he needs to find out who made the recording, why it was sent to him and to stop him before he does it again. The above synopsis doesn't do the film justice. The acting from everyone is top notch, the script is stunning, the visuals are jaw-dropping and the premise really makes you think about whether the world deserves to be saved at all. Strange Days was seen by about twelve people worldwide (OK, that's not exactly true, but it feels like it at times) and was another commercial failure $8million taken on a $42million budget) for the director, even though almost every critic fell over themselves with praise for the directing, the script, the acting (Angela Bassett is a force of nature), the premise, etc, etc. Switching things around, and perhaps feeling the sting of commercial failure, Bigelow went in a completely different direction with her next film (after a long break - 5yrs - natch), The Weight of Water. Made for next to nothing, the film tells the tale of Jean, a photographer for a national newspaper, who travels to the Isles of Shoals in an attempt to research the murder of two women in the late 1800s. Once there, she finds documents that claim to have been written by the lone survivor of the incident and the film hops between the murders and Jean's fear as she suspects her husband, who's also joined her on the trip with his brother and his brother's girlfriend. It's a tightly woven, nicely acted low-key movie that is completely different to everything Bigelow's done before (and since). Unsure of how to market it, the studio kept it on the shelf for over two years before finally releasing it in 2002 to little fanfare. Nevertheless, Kathryn was satisfied by the movie's reception and got to work on her next big project, the Harrison Ford starring submarine epic; K-19: The Widowmaker. Based on actual events, with the usual Hollywood tweaking, K-19 is the retelling of the situation in 1959 when the Soviets launched their new nuclear submarine and, during a run, the cooling system for the reactor malfunctioned, threatening to cause an explosion that would likely lead to the start of World War III. Harrison Ford plays Captain Alexei Vostrikov, with Liam Neeson as his second-in-command, as he tries to save the crew and prevent a disaster. As has become her trademark, despite good critical reviews, the film failed at the box-office, prompting some circles to call it K-19: The Career Tanker, but, seven years after her latest setback, Kathryn Bigelow would return with her greatest and most intimate movie ever; The Hurt Locker.  Set in Iraq during the second Gulf War, the story follows Sergeant First Class William James as he is promoted to be team leader of an Explosive Ordnance Disposal unit in the US Army after the death of their original leader. James is considered reckless by those under his command, although he is successful in diffusing many varying situations, befriending a young local boy along the way. Bigelow directs a startling tale of what it must be like "on the front line", how it affects people and the difficulties that come with it. The raw, almost camcorder feel to the shots really add to the tension and that's where Bigelow is at her best; kinetic tension. It's no surprise that this film is being showered with awards and nominations for her direction and for the movie as a whole, it really is that good, while the irony of her greatest movie being in direct competition with her former husband's greatest movie hasn't been lost on people either. So far, Avatar and The Hurt Locker are tied 1-1 when it comes to major award ceremonies, with Cameron taking the prizes at the Golden Globes while Bigelow triumphed at the BAFTAS. With both movies up for an incredible nine Oscars, we're only seven days away from finding out who will be victorious when the smoke clears. Of course, while the three ceremonies above are considered the big three, at least to the general public, there are other awards that have come Bigelow's way for her latest opus. She won the Directors Guild of America Award for Outstanding Achievement in Feature Film, the first time a female has taken that honour, as well as taking the Film Critics Association awards in Los Angeles, New York, Washington (first female winner), Chicago, Boston and Las Vegas. In Boston, the film was given five awards, the most anything has won since they were founded around thirty years ago. With all of that, The Hurt Locker became only the fourth film in history to take the prize in bot LA and New York, as well as the overall National Society of Film Critics award. The other three? Goodfellas, Schindler's List and L.A. Confidential. Now that is some serious company to be a part of. After all the years of toiling, being branded a commercial failure for most of her output and, yes, for being married to James Cameron, I'm so happy for her that she's finally being recognised for her work. I hope that the success of The Hurt Locker gets people to look into her back catalogue and that her earlier work will finally get the recognition it deserves. Where does she go from here? Maybe even the woman herself is undecided, but she's finally had her talent validated across the globe, so perhaps this will be her last hurrah behind the camera or, after another break, she'll be back to dazzle us again. What I do know is that, in seven days time, she'll be wearing a stunning outfit and sitting with baited breath to see if The Academy will follow the BAFTAS or the Golden Globes. No woman has ever won the Best Director Award at the Oscars, but, with this film, no woman has ever deserved it more. As much as I love Avatar, it would be a travesty if we don't hear "... and the award for Best Director goes to... KATHRYN BIGELOW" on March 7th.  --------------------------------------------------------------- Quote, Unquote (Fiona) ---------------------------------------------------------------  It seems that Vince McMahon can’t get enough of pissing off WWE fans, as the following announcement proves. Quote:
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--------------------------------------------------------------- Field Of Play (Laffy) ---------------------------------------------------------------  Snowboard Cross is a snowboard competition in which a group of snowboarders (usually four) start simultaneously, atop an inclined course, then race to reach the finish line first. If you were to look at this definition, you could be forgiven for thinking "my God, what a boring sport." Having missed Snowboard Cross in Turin, I wasn't expecting much, especially not to see one of the most exciting set of races that have kept me buzzing for days. Yes, four men have to race down a course and the first two qualify for the next round, but what they don't say is that practically anything goes. Crashes, teammates pushing other teammates forward to gain the advantage, mammoth jumps trying to gain crucial seconds by not slowing the speed and crushing the jumps, driver error and spectacular passing moments using the opponent's slipstream to get by. Possibly one of the best days ever; I didn't think anything could top that... until I saw the debut of Ski Cross. Ski Cross is even better! Normally, in World Cup races the, Ski Cross is a different course to the snowboarding, they tend to make the jumps smaller for ease. Canada didn't; they kept the same course and made Ski Cross really exciting. Watching a skier going for broke, flying of the jump 16” into the air landing, only to not be able to hold the landing then taking another skier out was amazing. Seeing the speed and the absolute determination of the skiers to finish, risking life and limb was brilliant. Some of the races, I was holding my breath, as some of the crashes looked brutal. I really wish the time difference was not so great, as the curling and the bob-sled have been immense, but I've been a zombie at work for the last 10 days. Will Canada do it? Will Canada win the only gold that they crave, or will the same result happen in the group stages; USA beating Canada for Gold? I, for one, am watching this match and the build up by the BBC has been great, really making you feel part of the action by understanding the pride and passion that hockey instills into the hearts of the Canadians. Other Sport Football: Will Sir Alex do it again and bring yet another trophy home to Old Trafford, or will Martin O’ Neil challenge and win through? Today, the first trophy and honours are settled and, for once, it could be an exciting affair. Rugby Union:When will Wales realise that the match is 80 minutes long and not 40? Letting sides run up a 17-20 point advantage and then trying to reel in the points and win in the second half is not the way to go about things. It's great for the neutrals, but, for two matches, I've sat thinking "what are Wales doing?" After the way we beat Scotland, I didn't think it could happen again, but Wales almost did it. Shane Williams is God, but he needs to help Wales win in the first half and not leave it till the last minute. However, think on this, with 7 seconds on the clock Frédéric Michalak kicked the ball out on the full and the ref blew for full time. Not a problem had the ball gone ten metres, but the ball did not even travel five metres. Now, the reason I have mentioned this is that Wales had the momentum and the ascendancy, they had the French on the rack and were going for the kill. Rugby Union rule 10 states that the ball must travel forwards at least 10 metres from the kick-off. If it does not, the opposition get the choice of a scrum or line-out on the halfway line, with the advantage of the feed or throw. A player must not intentionally infringe any law of the game, or play unfairly. Penalty: Penalty Kick. I know the ref can not prove Michalak meant to deliberately kick the ball out of play, but it should have been a least a scrum or lineout and, with Wales in the ascendancy, who knows what could have happened? Italy beat Scotland, Ireland beat England and both matches were full of excitement and passion. Although England and Scotland played well in patches, they couldn't keep the momentum up. Ireland and Italy seemed hungrier, they wanted it more and as time ticked on, Italy raised their game, their defence was immense and stopped Scotland’s attacks dead in their tracks. England, towards the end, seemed devoid of any ideas. They lacked the cutting edge and, at times, a leader to point the way, to take the game by the scuff of its neck and win. Snooker: This weekend marks the start of qualifying for the Crucible. Could history be rewritten and a legend of the game win this year? Jimmy White, John Parrot, Steve Davis, Graeme Dott and Ken Doherty are all trying to qualify for this year’s tournament. For me, I would love for dreams to come true, for time to roll back the years and Jimmy White to win the tournament that has always eluded him. I wish with all my heart that this miracle could occur and White will reign victorious!! --------------------------------------------------------------- Room 101 (Darkstar) ---------------------------------------------------------------  Welcome to Room101, the place where all the evils of mankind are stored, ready, should we require them as punishments… The rules for Room101 are simple, someone nominates 5 things that they hate, 5 things that would make the world a better place if they didn’t exist. I look at their nominations and reasons and should I agree that thing will be put into Room101. If more than 3 of the 5 go in then a bonus thing will be put in, even though I already rejected it. Should less than 3 go in then something evil will come back out. This issue we have JobberJoe stepping up to the plate. Can the Scotsman sneak the full 5 past uncle Darkstar? Lets see… Back-seat Gamers  This is what reno looks like. FACT! You go to your friend’s house, they’ve got the newest game and they hand you the joypad. Okay, so they’ve already played through it, but you can barely hold that against them. The excitement is overriding, your hands are shaking and the sweat is beginning to form on your brow. You play through the tutorial without too much difficulty and everything is brilliant, your taste buds have been teased and you’re ready to get your teeth into some proper action. And then they start. Every time you pause, no matter the reason, they step in to tell you where to go. When you fail on a puzzle they start trying to explain where you went wrong. They’re never happy with your performance and seem to be unwilling to let you take your time to explore the game as you want to. And they’re always the exact person who moans at you anytime you say anything while they’re playing. Even after they’ve died fifteen times they still swear that “I’ll get it next time – I don’t need your help”. Why don’t you give me a first attempt? So yeah, people who sit in the background and try to play the game through you, especially if they’re not as good as you are... it’s just really f*cking irritating and drains the fun out of everything. I am that person. I know I am, I hate being told or given hints, but I always find myself doing it. I know how bad it is, but I cant help myself and I apologise to everyone I have p*ssed off with this. IN! I’m interested in philosophy  DeCartes had nothing on the Bard I’m looking towards people and their social networking profiles just now and one specific part of it – generally what they claim to be interested in. You get various popular scenes which often include poetry, writing music, or photography... however the one that I’m picking on is “philosophy”. The reason is very simple, because I AM interested in philosophy and it bugs me to have people who really don’t have the first care, inclination, or whatever else, claiming to have a deep understanding. Who are even worse though, just thinking right now, are people who describe THEMSELVES as philosophical. It’s one of those words that don’t really mean anything at all... that’s like saying “I like to think” and you know, that’s nothing special. I’ve never really understood the need to exaggerate about what your interests are, especially on the internet, but hey-ho maybe I’m just sensible or something. Interest in something doesn’t mean having to have much knowledge (or any in Matt Dentons case  ) about the subject. Sure there are always ‘scenes’ that people latch on to and if its something you like then it can get frustrating. I know I hate reading people discussing military history/ethics of warfare when most of them don’t get how to look at both sides of an argument. I was going to keep it out, but I just convinced myself to put it IN! Internet Grammar Nazis  This is how Hitler funded WW2 I like the internet and I hate text speak on it. I think if you’re going to socialise with people who share a language with you, then both parties should do their very best to make their respective posts intelligible. It’s only polite, really. There are much funnier blogs than I’m going to be, so I’ll try and be straightforward with it: but then you get those people who have to nit-pick every single tiny mistake of either grammar or spelling thinking that they’re the bee’s knees of humour and satire. Let me tell you something pally, you’re not. Nobody is impressed by such ridiculous miniscule, irrelevant points. And what makes it worse is that it’s very, very difficult to have this kind of attitude without people getting really sick of you. I mean the occasional correction with a smiley and everybody has a good old laugh; but when it’s posts that are nothing but corrections, a snobbish “heh” and jumping at every opportunity... just... you know... come on pal... what are you achieving here ? Why not clean up the streets or lobby for better internet-grammar-courses in primary schools or something. *Newsletter Editors note: there is nothing wrong with being a Grammar Nazi! Say otherwise, Darkstar, and I expose your secrets… Ummm…. OUT! Jeremy Kyle  This is how he looks if you have vodka on your cornflakes. I remember, when I first saw Jeremy Kyle, I was taken aback. Here was a guy who wasn’t afraid to tell people exactly what they needed to be told – he was balanced, he gave everybody a chance to talk and seemed incredibly willing to get things sorted. I really, really liked him and thought he was such a great change from any other type of presenter I’d seen before. And then I watched more... and more... and more... Suddenly Jeremy’s brilliant philosophy about how the children should always come first and there had to be effort from both sides became one long set of clichés that Jim Ross would be ashamed of. His misplacement of sympathy to guests makes my skin crawl and his terrible treatment of alcoholics especially makes me want to scream at the television. I wouldn’t say he’s a bully, because that’s wrong, he just genuinely believes he’s better than the people on his show. He often seems to miss crucial points in stories and instead focus on something relatively irrelevant and repeat it over and over again. Then we’ve got “It says ‘The Jeremy Kyle Show’ show on the wall so shut your mouth because it’s my time to talk”. Just... garrrrgh... His entrance where he asks people how they’re doing, shaking hands and walking through the crowd from the back... f*ck off... I have grown to despise Jeremy Kyle – really, really hate him with a delicious passion that has a caramel-flavoured centre. Jeremy Kyle as a show is genius, scum slating scum. Its brilliant and perfect TV. But as a person, no. His ex wife accused him of Developed a serious betting habit. Cleaned out her bank account without her knowing. Pretended he hadn't got long to live when they married. Would scream insults calling her a slut and slag. Walked out on her and their five-month-old baby. Drove a wedge between Kirsty (his then wife) and her best friend by pretending she had accused them of having an affair. http://www.mirror.co.uk/sunday-mirro...8487-20058422/ So, as a person, he is the shits, and he’s not only going in to Room101, he’s the caretaker. IN!!! Unfunny People  As unfunny as they get! This is huge because it’s the old “one man’s rubbish is another man’s treasure”, but unfunny people grate me. I’m an incredibly flexible guy as far as humour goes, and think I can appreciate all sorts of funny... and, Gud damn it, laughing is what keeps me going through life, because the world just isn’t the greatest place in the universe ever. So if we can’t share a few laughs, then there are going to be serious problems. If I don’t find somebody funny then it’s almost certain there isn’t going to be any sort of friendship there – it’s just that damn important to me. As far as I’m concerned (in an unnecessarily brash stereotype) people who aren’t funny don’t add enough to the world. Unfunny people are also usually the ones who get offended most easily and instead spent their time either a) ruining truly funny moments by trying to impose their bad jokes on you or b) writing into the Daily Mail to make the world a generally worse place by furthering that paper’s existence. Are there any unfunny people who aren’t seriously mentally and emotionally ill? Like you say, each to their own; I don’t find Lee Evans funny, but some people do. And don’t even get me started on when someone puts on a crappy northern accent and exclaims ‘GARLIC BREAD!?’ Grrrrr! No, as a full category I cant put them in. Sorry, OUT! That’s 3/5 Mr Joe, that means you get to choose one of your rejected nominations in regardless. Which is your choice young man? Internet Grammar Nazis OK, you win. And not even DC can prevent it now. But be aware that we don’t forget things like this… Until next time, goodbye and remember that I am watching you. ---------------------------------------------------------------  Life belongs to the living, and he who lives must be prepared for changes. Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe (1749-1832) German poet, novelist and dramatist --------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------- Wrestling 101 Info Centre ---------------------------------------------------------------  Latest Wrestling 101 Blogs: > SSP#22: WWE Money In the Bank Predictions, SSP Top Ten(w/NXT) and More > What could have been? Plus current thoughts on WWE and TNA Shows > Now Thats What I Call Wrestling #11: WWE Elimination Chamber – Analysis, Possibilities and Predictions --------------------------------------------------------------- This Week in WWE (TPIB) ---------------------------------------------------------------  WWE Monday Night RAW February 22, 2010 Results One night after an absolutely shocking WWE Elimination Chamber event, the 874th edition of Monday Night RAW came to you, live, from the Conseco Fieldhouse in Indianapolis, IN. Singer Jewel & her husband, bull rider Ty Murray, would serve as Guest Co-Hosts of a, no doubt, chaotic edition of Monday Night RAW. Match Results
WWE NXT February 23, 2010 Results The debut edition of the “next evolution of the WWE”, WWE NXT, came to you from the Bradley Center in Milwaukee, WI. Eight WWE Pros will mentor eight Rookies with the winning Rookie earning a WWE Contract to join RAW or SmackDown. New World Heavyweight Champion Chris Jericho would serve as the Pro to his Rookie Wade Barrett, former ECW Champion Christian would serve as the Pro for Rookie Heath Slater, former World Heavyweight Champion CM Punk would serve as the Pro to his Rookie Darren Young, R-Truth would serve as the Pro for Rookie David “The Marquee” Otunga, Matt Hardy would serve as the Pro to Rookie Justin Gabriel, Carlito would be the Pro for Rookie Michael Tarver, and United States & Unified WWE Tag Team Champion The Miz would serve as the Pro for independent wrestling veteran, Daniel Bryan.. Match Results
WWE Superstars February 25, 2010 Results The 45th edition of WWE Superstars came to you from the Conseco Fieldhouse in Indianapolis and from the Bradley Center in Milwaukee, WI. In a rematch from last week’s SmackDown, Matt Hardy, Maria, & The Great Khali would team up to face all three members of The Hart Dynasty in a 6-Person Mixed Tag Match. One of the newest members of the RAW Roster, William Regal, would team with “The All-American American” Jack Swagger to face “The Masterpiece” Chris Masters & Santino Marella. The newest addition to RAW, Zack Ryder would be in action as “The Long Island Loudmouth” would go one-on-one with Primo. Match Results
WWE Friday Night SmackDown February 26, 2010 Results The 549th edition of WWE Friday Night SmackDown came to you from the Bradley Center in Milwaukee, WI. With WrestleMania just 30 days away, seven Superstars would be hoping to join RAW Superstar Christian in punching their ticket to WrestleMania and competing in the annual Money-in-the-Bank Ladder Match as three Money-in-the-Bank Qualifying Matches would take place as CM Punk would go one-on-one with Shelton Benjamin, Intercontinental Champion Drew McIntyre would face Kane in a non-title WWE Elimination Chamber rematch, and, in a Triple Threat Match, John Morrison, R-Truth, & Dolph Ziggler would all compete for spots in the Money-in-the-Bank Ladder Match. Ever since Mickie James inadvertently dumped cottage cheese on Vickie Guerrero a few weeks ago, the SmackDown Consultant has had it out for Mickie James and, on SmackDown, Vickie has made a match where Mickie James will defend the Women’s Title against former champion Michelle McCool, but the “x-factor” will be the Special Referee as Vickie Guerrero herself will serve as the referee. Match Results
--------------------------------------------------------------- The Impact Zone (Alan Smithee) ---------------------------------------------------------------  This time out, I'd like to present to you an article on TNA's inability to avoid the "just another wrestler" phenomenon that seems to strike every single wrestler that comes in with a flash of brilliance or amid a blast of hype, only to end up as another cog in the roster. Sometimes it doesn't happen straight away, but, in other instances, it's almost overnight. There have been many examples of this, names like Booker T, Bobby Lashley, Brian Kendrick, Jethro Holliday, Suicide, Raven, Tara, Melissa Anderson, Sheik Abdul Bashir, Judas Mesias, Rellik (possibly a record) and Austin Aries were all pushed on their debuts/returns as something above the standard midcarders already on the roster, but found themselves treading water in very little time at all, their push derailed. Even with all of them, though, there is one name that stands out above all the rest and that name is Desmond Wolfe. The man formerly known as Nigel McGuiness made the kind of debut that was as close to perfection as you can imagine. Interrupting Kurt Angle and then laying him out backstage, before "injuring" his neck with a lariat the following week. Of course, had TNA's production staff actually stayed with the injured Angle, this segment might actually have done some good in the long run.  Following on from that, Wolfe had two slobberknockers with Kurt on PPV, with his unique offence allowing him to stand out from the crowd. Even in defeat, Wolfe was head and shoulders above the entire roster, it didn't hurt him. Losing his next big match to Angle did, however, as it basically showed that Desmond couldn't defeat Kurt in an actual match setting. Add in to this the fact his finishers were being kicked out of far to regularly (his lariat, which hospitalised Angle, was now not even keeping people down) and you had someone on a downward spiral. Great matches were still forthcoming though, with a fantastic outing against AJ Styles for the TNA Championship coming between his two PPV matches with Kurt Angle, but lately, his star has slipped and the aura he projected has diminished to the point he has become the latest victim of the "just another wrestler" curse. Take the recent Against All Odd event, an eight-man tournament to decide the #1 Contender to AJ's title at Lockdown (it seems not even TNA care about their next PPV, Destination X). Wolfe faced off against D'Angelo Dinero (another one who suffered from "JAW", but seems to have overcome it and regained his footing) and lost in the first round. Following that, he was part of a run-in faction under the guidance of Eric Bischoff alongside Tomko (who went from AJ's mystery stalker to nobody in the space of a single episode of Impact), Raven, Rhino and Homicide, four others who are all feeling the effects of "JAW" syndrome. Is it too late for Desmond Wolfe? I seriously hope not and look to The Pope for inspiration, for belief that Wolfe can recover from this affliction and return to the glory his original appearances hinted at. Many scoffed at how WWE deciding not to sign him was a blessing in disguise, that Bryan Danielson would regret his decision and, for a while, that seemed to be the case, but if you looked at the last week of programming (this was written before the Feb 25th Impact), Desmond Wolfe is as low as he's been since signing for TNA while, on NXT, Daniel Bryan (Danielson) has made his debut, basically as himself, with WWE acknowledging both his experience and his skill inside the ring. Add to that, a growing feud with Miz and, while it will take longer than Wolfe just waltzing in and challenging Angle straight away, perhaps the patient approach will pay off more in the end. I hope I'm wrong and Desmond Wolfe comes back and leads the charge as TNA enters the Second Monday Night War while, at the same time, Daniel Bryan becomes a hit in WWE, but knowing TNA's track record of turning someone special into someone in the background, I fear it may already be too late. --------------------------------------------------------------- The Live Wire v2.0 (Inno) ---------------------------------------------------------------  Well, hello. It’s one of those weeks for this column, I’m afraid. As in, it’s the week that’s it’s due to be submitted. Folks, I’ll be honest with you, not a lot in wrestling over the past fortnight has inspired me to whip out the old metaphorical pen and paper… or in this modern age, hold down CTRL + SHIFT + `(which is the keyboard shortcut for my word processor, fact fans) and set the old noggin working. Elimination Chamber has come and gone, and lordy lordy, strike me down with bolts of lightning, SuperCena got the strap and lost it within minutes. Shocker! Or would have been had it not been done before by Edge… and Batista being a hired gun for Vince McMahon? Also a nice angle… had it not been done before by countless others in the not-so-distant past. Maybe it’s just me getting old, and maybe it’s just the fact that there are only so many storylines to go round, but this current crop of angles and storyline that the WWE - and their illustrious competition - are throwing up just feels recycled and stale. Over in TNB - Total Nonstop Bischoff - Jeff Jarrett AND Mick Foley are being persecuted by Eric Bischoff… Kurt Angle is being inspired by the armed forces of the US… AJ Styles is a young champion being “shown the way” by Ric Flair… all sound familiar? Rehashing older stuff isn’t always bad. The HBK/Taker angle is basically about two guys wanting to fight to see who’s better. Taker didn’t want to, so HBK was forced to resort to underhand tactics to force the issue. At its essence, it’s an old fashioned “respect” feud - but the sheer personality of the two guys involved is carrying it. Of course, there’s the matter of that simply incredible video package the WWE put together for the feud. Set to Placebo’s amazing cover of the old Kate Bush track “Running Up That Hill”, that video was as perfect a hype machine as you could hope for. It was passionate, it was emotional, and it used the lyrics perfectly. That is an example of how you CAN go to past glories and revisit them, but still make them relevant, exactly the opposite of how the WWE have coped with the Bret Hart angle. For years, Bret vs. Vince or Bret vs. Shawn was THE big unresolved issue in wrestling and was just money waiting to be printed… if done correctly. While it’s nice to see Shawn and Bret be professional with each other, admit it - you’d have bought into Bret’s return a little more if HBK had been the cocky little son-of-an-unnamed-goat that he was back in the day, and that there was still a little spark between him and Bret, even if it was just on screen. I totally understand that Bret can’t put in an in ring performance to blow off the Montreal cobwebs once and for all. I even understand transferring the perceived anger from Shawn to Vince to allow for an even playing field. I EVEN understand Vince taking Big Dave to fight his corner - he is a big, bad man after all… I just don’t get the involvement from SuperCena. It should have been DH Smith, or Tyson Kidd - someone actually connected to Bret. Even if that meant “downscaling” Batista, to someone like say… Drew McIntyre - the Vince/Bret animosity if channelled correctly would have been enough that could have slotted in anyone against a Hart family member and peeps would still have bought into it. Imagine the rub that McIntyre vs. DH Smith would have had with Vince and Bret in their respective corners. A rub that neither Batista nor Cena need - and they could still have been programmed into an inter-brand match somehow, without being tacked on to the Bret issue. Maybe, just maybe… I expect too much. Maybe we all do. It’s easy to be an armchair booker, sat behind a keyboard, observing from a distance. I always at least try to enjoy the positive, make it mean more than the negative. Food for thought, peeps. Have fun, go mad. --------------------------------------------------------------- On The Mic (Dante Spears) ---------------------------------------------------------------  Elimination Chamber Woes...  In 2008 WWE put together an Elimination Chamber match to determine who would challenge for the WWE Championship because the storyline called for John Cena to cash in his Royal Rumble shot at No Way Out. Considering the Chamber would be set up, someone got the bright idea to have a Smackdown Elimination Chamber match to determine who would wrestle for the World Heavyweight Championship at Wrestlemania. The end result was two solid Elimination Chamber matches and an almost 50% buyrate increase for the event from the previous year. Neither titles changed hands and the idea of the challengers having to go through one of the most difficult wrestling matches in order to get to Wrestlemania added some to the matches. The next year however Randy Orton was headed to Wrestlemania and somebody with the stink of death about him realized last year’s concept of determining the two challengers for the World Title wouldn’t work this year. But they weren’t about to let something that proved so wildly successful be passed so they instead had the two World Championships on the line. Well another No Way Out (or WWE Elimination Chamber if you must) has come and gone and Wrestlemania is now an utterly glitzy spec on the horizon. Last Sunday we saw Sheamus lose the WWE Championship to John Cena who then lost it to Batista, and the Undertake lose the World Heavyweight Championship to Chris Jericho. Now let’s be a little fair to the WWE: there’s no way in hell they’d send Sheamus into the biggest pay per view of the year as the reigning WWE Champ and they’ve been “building” Jericho and Edge since July of last year. Undertaker’s reign clocked in at 140 days which was the longest reign in almost 5 years, and the first reign to go over 100 days since Edge’s third reign back in 2007/2008. Sheamus had a reign of 70 days which is only slightly shorter than the longest reign of last year (Randy Orton at 90 days). The WWE have got it into their head that the way to have a feud going is to trade the World Championships back and forth at every PPV. Despite the fact it killed CM Punk’s momentum, I like Undertaker’s long reign because it put some credibility back into the championship which had already been traded around seven times that year. So what’s my point? Well I’m sick of the WWE changing the titles before Wrestlemania. Before last year’s No Way Out Jeff Hardy and Edge had everything in place for a match at Wrestlemania. Even Triple H and Jeff Hardy had a storyline ready to go with Jeff Hardy avenging HHH constantly beating him throughout later 2008. But the WWE seemingly had no faith in people who weren’t their normal top guys of Triple H, Orton, and John Cena. So instead of seeing feuds that have been building we got a completely arbitrary Triple H vs. Randy Orton feud and an equally arbitrary John Cena and Edge feud, both of which we’ve seen before to many times to count. Wrestlemania 22 had the same problem with Orton being needlessly interjected into a Mysterio and Angle feud and Edge’s feet being pulled out from underneath him with Triple H and John Cena being forced upon us. Wrestlemania 21 (when I first started paying attention), 23 and 24 all benefited from a long builds from the Royal Rumble. Wrestlemania 22 and 25 both shuffled the feuds around randomly in between the Royal Rumble and No Way Out and the end product was poorer for it. What really would’ve been the problem in giving Jericho the World Title after he lost the Unified Tag Team titles? Instead of reducing him to a comedy character for Guest Hosts you could have rewarded a hard working wrestler with a longer world title reign and it may have meant something when Edge inevitably beats Jericho for the World Heavyweight Championship at Wrestlemania. Feuds work better if they have some time to them. In this day and age a three month build to a match is an insane amount of time, and if you think about it should be completely easy to pull off in between the Royal Rumble in Wrestlemania. But no, the WWE have this weird idea that the titles both need to change hand a few weeks before Wrestlemania. I’m sick of it. Hopefully next year there will be a more natural growing feud as opposed to the WWE going in one direction and then at WWE Elimination Chamber suddenly forcing a feud down our throats that they think we want to see. Would you like to guest host an edition of 'On The Mic'? PM Kam ---------------------------------------------------------------  Everything changes, nothing remains without change. Buddha (563 BC-483 BC) Founder of Buddhism --------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------------- Final Thoughts -------------------------------------------------------------- And there we have it, yet another edition of the newsletter in the bag. I'd like to thank all the writers for their continued contributions because, without them and their willingness to do this work for free, we'd be nothing. I'd also like to thank the loyal readers of the newsletter and let them know that we do what we do for them. Some of the more eagle-eyed among you may have noticed that the competition I mentioned a few weeks ago failed to materialise. That was due to some unforseen issues, but they've now been resolved, so, in the special March 21st edition, there will be a (small-scale) competition with some unique prizes for the winners. Newsletter Editor: DC  --------------------------------------------------------------- Contributors --------------------------------------------------------------- Thanks to everybody who contributed to this issue of the TWO Newsletter: NEXT EDITION: Sunday 21st March *WrestleMania Special*
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"Kenner, just in case we get killed, I wanted to tell you that you have the biggest d*ck I've ever seen on a man." - Brandon Lee to Dolph Lundgren; Showdown in Little Tokyo I say hip! You say popotamus! Definition of karma: America being invaded by oil. Last edited by Kam; 28-02-2010 at 10:52 PM. |
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Celebrating 10 years online